#23 - Count It All Joy (James 1 Parenting Lessons)

 In this episode of Kingdom Mothers, I share a powerful moment when God met me right in the middle of motherhood—through James 1. What if the trials we face in parenting aren’t obstacles, but divine opportunities? What if the meltdowns, messes, and long nights are the very things God is using to mature us and build spiritual endurance? 

Join me as I unpack how the challenges with my son became a classroom of grace, patience, and transformation. When we choose to lean into God’s Word and parent His way, we are refined, strengthened, and made more like Christ. If you're walking through a tough season of motherhood, I pray this encourages you to count it all joy. 

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Transcript

18:50:46 Welcome back to another episode of Kingdom Others. I'm your host Brandy Thomas and today we're going to be diving into James 1.
18:50:54 And talking about parenting and how parenting can be Refining can help mature you in your walk with the Lord.
18:51:02 And how we should count it all joy. So let's dive in.
18:51:35 Perfect.
18:51:43 Welcome back to another episode. I am so excited to be diving into James 1 with you all today.
18:51:49 And just sharing some wisdom that God downloaded to me when I was just Having a day as a mother and just Seeking God's wisdom, seeking God's truth on how do I parent my son and what is the best way to do that?
18:52:05 And how to do it in a biblical way. So a little background. I host a Bible study about once a month.
18:52:14 With a couple different couples in my neighborhood I mean, we have like a road On the road, it's not like your traditional we're out in the country but It's a way that I get to serve my neighbors and get to know them.
18:52:31 And we really enjoyed, we just finished judges and now we're diving into james And I was reading James after just reading having a difficult experience, if you will, with my son Just… She has very strong emotions and she has very strong emotions
18:52:51 Right now I'm teaching them how to regulate those emotions. And so I was just like having some quiet time, just going to god started reading chapter one. And I just have to laugh. So I feel like my relationship with God
18:53:07 Is kind of sarcastic or just like god God's got jokes with me.
18:53:13 And so as I'm reading 1 James verse 2, it says consider it great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials. And in my head, it was like, whenever you experience Elijah trials because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance
18:53:33 And let endurance have its full effect on you so that you may be mature and complete lacking nothing.
18:53:40 And then it goes on to say, now, if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God who gives all generously, gives to all generously and ungrudgingly And it will be given to him. But let him ask in faith without doubting.
18:53:54 For the doubters is like surging seed Driven and tossed by the wind.
18:54:00 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord and being double-minded and unstable in all his ways.
18:54:06 And then it goes on to talk about how that the brother of humble circumstances boasts in his exaltation, but let the rich boast in his humiliation because he will pass away like flowers in the field So… goes on in verse 12 to say blessed is the one who endures trials because when he has stood the test he will
18:54:29 Received a crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
18:54:36 And then… It talks about how God doesn't tempt you And every good and perfect gift is from above coming down from the father of lights who does not change like shifting shadows by his own choice, he gave us birth
18:54:54 By the word of truth. We would be a kind of first roots to his creation.
18:55:01 Creatures. And then it goes on to say, everyone in verse 19, everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger.
18:55:11 For human anger does not accomplish God's righteousness. Therefore, ridding yourselves of all moral filth and the evil that is prevalent humbly receive the implanted word which is able to save your souls.
18:55:27 And then jumping down to verse 25. It says, but the one who looks intently into the perfect law of freedom and perseveres in it and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer who works This person will be blessed.
18:55:43 In what he does. If anyone thinks he is religious without controlling his tongue, his religion is useless and he deceives himself, pure and undefiled religion before God the Father is this, to look after orphans and widows in their distress to keep oneself
18:56:02 Stained from the world. So that I basically just read chapter one to you. And here's what God revealed to me as I was reading it through the lens of a parents. And I was just like okay Consider these trials.
18:56:18 Of parenting these parenting trials great joy because as i was coming up against these different trials and just like things that Elijah's throwing my way, right?
18:56:35 These trials, they're maturing me. They're creating endurance. And in the end, it's going to help me to become whole and lacking Nothing.
18:56:48 And it goes on to talk about how God gives generously and ungrudgingly.
18:56:51 And so when we ask and face without doubting. And don't have a double mind, God is going to give us wisdom in our parenting.
18:56:59 And he's going to give us wisdom generously. But we have to pursue God.
18:57:06 Instead of all these other things, pursue God and he's going to give us all that we need, all the riches that we need as in the parenting space.
18:57:19 And I just think This was just encouraging to me when I read it from this perspective.
18:57:29 And also being reminded that as parents, we do need to be quick to listen and slow to speak and slow to anger. And this is something that I've been As I'm teaching my son how to regulate his emotions, I first have to regulate my own emotions.
18:57:45 And so as I'm coming up against the different trials of parenting, the different emotions, the different Things that my child needs As he's learning as he's learning regulate his emotions as he's learning to to speak what's on his mind
18:58:02 As I'm trying to become more empathetic and really just get to know him, I need to seek first to understand, be quick to listen.
18:58:12 And slow to speak and slow to anger.
18:58:17 And what God really called out to me is like, okay, how many times do my emotions get unregulated? Do I get overstimulated and overwhelmed because of what my son is doing?
18:58:31 Instead of taking just like a breath and stepping back and seeing my child from the perspective of God's lens.
18:58:39 And reminding and reframing the situation of, okay, this is a child of God.
18:58:46 And… Who is my son? My son is a kingdom warrior. He is somebody who is going to build and create and heal and help He is somebody who's going to use his words to create kingdom impact and his energy to go around the globe
18:59:02 And speak a life and share the gospel. So reminding myself of who God created him to be and his divine identity in those moments instead of just being sucked into the circumstances and into the moment and yes This is easier said than done.
18:59:20 But the more I can practice this. The more I can be quick to listen and truly understand okay what is happening to my child right now? Is he feeling unseen and unheard?
18:59:31 And frustrated. Where's this big emotion coming from? Why is he feeling the stress?
18:59:37 Or maybe this anxiousness and it's coming out in aggression or it's coming out in these big tears.
18:59:47 And God just reminded me, be slow to speak. Be quick to listen.
18:59:52 Slow to anger. Because when I can't control my own emotions, how am I going to teach my son how to regulate And he's in the space right now where we have to co-regulate he cannot He's not developmentally mature enough to regulate himself.
19:00:08 I think it's up until like maybe h7 where they start to have the logic part of their brain coming in and they can start to to regulate a little bit better, they have to co-regulate with me my son has to co-regulate with me.
19:00:23 Which means I have to regulate myself. And so I've been doing a lot of work to learn how to learn how allow myself to heal to allow my emotions to be heard and seen and valued and appreciated So that I can regulate my emotions
19:00:41 First, and to help my son to regulate his. And this is why i love the Bible and going to the bible for wisdom because it's here. God gives us everything we need And so as we're parenting I want you to consider it
19:01:00 Joy, great joy, pure joy when you face a trial in parenting.
19:01:07 In your parenting journey. Because guess what? These moments are going to produce maturity in you They're going to produce patients. They're going to produce wisdom they're going to produce endurance And in turn, you're going to be able to Help your child co-regulate you're going to
19:01:27 Teach your child to be quick to listen. You're going to teach your child how to be slow to speak and slow to anger.
19:01:34 Which will, when we do this, because anger does not produce the righteousness of god by exemplifying being quick to listen and so to speak and slow to anger and counting your trials all joy You're going to actually teach your son, your daughter, the righteousness of God and how to produce the righteousness of God. And when we can see parenting
19:01:57 As a a way to mature us in our journey and mature us in our faith walk and as a way that God's using it to complete us so that we actually lack nothing We can look at parenting from parenting
19:02:12 For what it is, which is uh beautiful and gracious gift from the Lord so that we get to know him better From that role as a parent and just grow in our faith so much. I've grown so much more i think quickly
19:02:30 And just… have a different perspective and a different eyes for my own parents, for myself for my son and because I'm learning how our father god is a father, a parrot.
19:02:46 So I thought this was really cool and I just wanted to share this with you, Horn.
19:02:52 This episode. Of how we can look when we read the Bible. Sometimes I read the Bible from an entrepreneurship perspective and lately I've been trying to read it from a parenting perspective And when we kind of shift different ways we can god can just like speak to us
19:03:12 And give us wisdom for what we need in this specific seasons of our life.
19:03:20 And so I hope this encourages you and I encourage you to go back and read James 1 for yourself and see what other nuggets of wisdom that god speaks to you What I just think it's really cool that As a parent, God's teaching us
19:03:35 You will produce the righteousness Of God, when you are quick to listen and so to speak and so to anger. And I am maturing you.
19:03:44 And I am giving you wisdom. And I just want you to lack nothing And I'm going to give to you generously and ungrudgingly When you truly seek me.
19:03:55 And I want you to look at these parenting journey journeys that you're on as a gift and as something to like view with great joy Because they're going to produce good fruit, not only in yourself as a parent but
19:04:14 You're going to see the harvest come through your child as well.
19:04:21 So there's my wisdom little nuggets that I just want to share with you some takeaways as I was reading scripture this week.
19:04:28 I hope this blesses you and I look forward to hearing from you in the comments. Please make sure you like and subscribe.
19:04:36 Share if this was a blessing for you, you can also tag me In Victorious acres living if this bless you, take a screenshot of you listening to it and share it out. So with that, I appreciate you all and I hope you have a great day.