#37: Homeschool vs. Public School (Discerning What’s Right for Your Family) Ft. Sinsimilla Osei

 In this episode, Brandie sits down with guest Sinsimilla Osei for a heart-to-heart conversation about education — homeschool vs. public school — and how Kingdom mothers can prayerfully discern what’s best for their children and family. Together, they unpack the spiritual, practical, and cultural considerations that come with each path and explore how to invite the Holy Spirit into this deeply personal decision. Whether you’re already homeschooling, sending your kids to public school, or somewhere in between, this episode will equip and encourage you to walk in peace and confidence with God’s direction for your family. 

Transcript

12:53:06 as Kingdom Mothers be homeschooling or sending our children to public school?
12:53:11 Welcome back to another episode of Kingdom Mother. On today's episode, I'm going to be joined by a sweet friend, Sinsamilla Ose.
12:53:19 She's from the UK, she's a wife mom of four, foster carer.
12:53:24 Business owner and author of Not Just a Mother, How God Uses Parenthood as Kingdom Purpose.
12:53:29 We're gonna be diving into the pros and cons of homeschooling.
12:53:34 public school, and how to really discern what is right for your family and your children.
12:53:40 Before we get started, I want to share a little bit more about Sinsmill and her story. So, her and I were just divinely.
12:53:46 connected. Uh, she happened to just reach out to me, found some of my.
12:53:51 content and reached out to me, and we got on a call, and we've literally been voice chatting each other back and forth since we met. So, so excited to have.
12:54:00 her on the podcast today. Her story is one of faith and waiting and obedience.
12:54:05 And she went from longing to become a mother to realizing that God was actually calling her into something much deeper. And I'm sure you guys could.
12:54:14 recognize this, since you looked into the Kingdom Mothers podcast, that.
12:54:18 We really are not just… Mothers. We're… we're… Kingdom Mothers, who are raising our children.
12:54:30 As a ministry, this is kingdom ministry that God calls you to intentionally, with each life that He has placed in your hands.
12:54:36 And he's providing you a chance for you to live out the Great Commission and produce true disciples of Jesus.
12:54:44 Even when you think you're just doing what everyone else is doing.
12:54:48 Since Sunilla is passionate about helping others recognize the divine purpose.
12:54:52 And their everyday lives, and showing that God uses even the most ordinary moments for His extraordinary plans.
12:54:59 So, without further ado, I hope you enjoy our podcast, and let's dive in!
13:11:40 I forgot my haircorn.
13:11:45 Hi, Kingdom Mothers! Welcome back to another episode. I'm your host, Brandi Thomas, and like I said in my intro, I'm so excited to have a sweet new friend of mine, Sinsamilla Ose, from the UK.
13:11:55 And we're going to be diving into homeschooling versus public schooling, and I think we're going to be able to provide some really good.
13:12:01 insight, because we'll be coming from different, like, public schools, we're homeschooling, we're both doing different things, so I'm excited for this conversation. Before we dive in, though, I want to do a quick prayer. So, Father, we just thank you so much for the blessing of.
13:12:15 The relationship in this new friendship that you've brought into my life, I just ask that your blessing and favor fall upon this episode, that our words be your words, and that our message be your message, and it just flows through us today, Father.
13:12:28 Bless the women who are going to be hearing this, and just help it to provide clarity.
13:12:33 Help them to have just more discernment on if they're questioning whether they should do homeschooling versus public school for their family and their children.
13:12:40 Um, and really just to also understand, like, the seasons of life that they're in, and what is… the right next step for them and their families.
13:12:48 I just thank you so much for the opportunity to, um.
13:12:52 To be a vessel with this Kingdom Mothers podcast, I pray this in your name, Jesus. Amen.
13:12:57 Amen.
13:12:59 Well, thank you so much, Sisabila, for being on the podcast today. How are you doing?
13:13:11 I love it.
13:13:03 Oh, I'm wonderful! Thanks so much for having me. I always… now you're the friend that I speak about all the time, so… So it's amazing to be able to join you now, finally, on Kingdom Mothers, and I'm sure that it's going to be a blessed but amazing.
13:13:21 conversation to get more than one perspective, I think, is going to be great.
13:13:20 Mm-hmm.
13:13:25 When it comes to homeschooling versus public schooling.
13:13:34 Definitely.
13:13:28 Mm-hmm. Yes, I agree. I'm excited because there's so many nuances, I think, to this conversation, too, and… So, there's a lot of different ways we can go, so… I would love you to share a little bit about your family, and what led you to choose your current schooling path.
13:13:46 Okay, great. So, um, I'm sure you… I know you said this in your introduction, but I have a… what I class as a large family.
13:13:53 Uh, so I have four, uh, birth children of my own, and then I have 2 foster children at the moment as well.
13:14:10 Yes.
13:14:00 Um, so we are a very big, loud. fun family. Um, I… I always say that we're blessed, I think, I mean, we're all blessed, but… I… I always look at my children and think, wow, I can't believe that God chose me.
13:14:16 Um, so… when it came to schooling, that was a really, really difficult.
13:14:23 area for me and my husband, really, because before we had children, we always said.
13:14:31 Yeah.
13:14:29 Oh, no, we're going to homeschool our children, that's just a given. It looked great, we'd never done it, of course, but it looked… It looked like the thing that we should do. But then when we actually had children.
13:14:41 We didn't go down that road, and we actually found a, um, independent, so it would be a private Christian school.
13:14:48 Um, and we thought, you know what, actually, this is great, because we want them to go to a school that follows the Bible.
13:14:55 So, we're going to send them to this school.
13:15:14 Mm-hmm.
13:14:58 But, as the years progressed, that age-old thought. about homeschooling, started to come back, and I think what happens is you realize that something that you thought about years ago, it was never really you thinking about it. It was something that the Holy Spirit placed inside of you, and actually, you just… you attributed it to your own thoughts.
13:15:21 But it wasn't, which is why it came back.
13:15:23 So, for our family, we made this… it was a long journey, but we made the decision eventually, I think, under duress.
13:15:31 To actually take our children out of school and begin homeschooling them.
13:15:36 Mm-hmm. Well… What was, like, the first sense for you that you're like, okay, God is actually leading us to this decision.
13:15:44 Mm-mm.
13:15:45 And, you know, we've got a clear calling, or was it more kind of a gradual process? Because I know you started in public school, so what was the process like of actually, like.
13:15:54 making that final decision, okay, I'm actually… we're pulling them out.
13:15:58 Yeah, so actually it started with, um, my youngest at the time.
13:16:04 He was 5, and he was being bullied. At school. So, for any mother.
13:16:07 Okay.
13:16:11 you know, that hears that their child's been bullied. It is like someone has taken your own heart!
13:16:12 Mm-hmm.
13:16:18 out of your body, and for me, that's exactly how it felt. Kind of, I had to do investigative work to find out what was happening with him, his demeanor changed.
13:16:26 His personality was totally different. And eventually, we got to the bottom of the fact that he.
13:16:32 was being bullied. So whilst the school addressed it, once we had spoken to them about it.
13:16:33 Yeah.
13:16:37 it was now a sore spot for me. And so, in speaking to my husband about it, he actually.
13:16:40 Yeah.
13:16:45 admitted them that he felt like we were meant to be homeschooling them, and that the bullying episode was just a reminder that we weren't actually walking in obedience.
13:16:58 Um, with God into that particular area. So. I have to admit something that I probably don't say enough, which is that I was totally against it.
13:17:07 When he said… when he said it. I said, oh, that sounds great, but… you know, I don't think that I can do that.
13:17:15 If I'm honest, I don't think that I can do that. I think it looks like it involves a lot more than… I have the capabilities to kind of do. So, I was just honest about that, but he… he didn't push it.
13:17:24 Yeah.
13:17:28 But he did say, you know, I do feel like the Lord is really… you know, telling me that this is what we should be doing. And I just went away, and I said, you know, okay.
13:17:36 Okay, I have a relationship with God, so if this is what He wants us to do, He'll tell me, right? He'll tell me.
13:17:40 Mm-hmm. Yeah.
13:17:41 Um, so I… I heard nothing, actually, and then I… And then I think a few weeks later, I was scrolling through Instagram, and I think the day before that, I had said to the Lord, oh, you know.
13:17:53 I know my husband's waiting for me to mention it again. I'm not gonna say anything, but… If this is something that we should be doing with our children.
13:18:01 Help me find a curriculum, because… I have no clue where I would even start.
13:18:08 So, the next day, I was scrolling through Instagram, I was on Stories.
13:18:12 And, um, I clearly had a lot of time on my hands, and I was just scrolling through.
13:18:17 And somebody that I know, that I used to go to church with, she posted, oh, I'm so glad that we started this homeschooling curriculum, and I thought, oh gosh.
13:18:27 This year? This is… this is the Lord saying, okay.
13:18:33 That's great! Here you go. And it was like delivering it, like he had just delivered this into my lap.
13:18:40 And so I… I thought, okay, well, the least I can do is check out what this curriculum is.
13:18:45 And so I did, and I fell in love with it.
13:18:47 just on reading what it was about. made me think, oh, wow, I can actually… I could actually do this.
13:18:54 And so I went back to my husband, finally, and admitted that I'd been having conversations with the Lord.
13:19:00 And that I now felt like he was directing us.
13:19:04 Um, to take our children, because it was just our sons at the time, take our sons out of school.
13:19:09 and see if we could actually, you know, homeschool them well, and do it well, because it had to be done well.
13:19:16 That was the biggest thing for me. There was no point taking them out of school, thinking that, you know, just feeling really hubris, like, I can do it, but actually.
13:19:26 falling flat, and I didn't want to do that.
13:19:15 Yes, yeah. My journey was a little bit different, because I had my heart set on homeschooling.
13:19:35 Oh my goodness.
13:19:35 We did pre-K, preschool, pre-K through our church, which is, like, our preachers Lum, and she was a godsend, and we helped her start the preschool. So, like, that was… I was like, that'll be good, it's like a half day, three times a week.
13:19:49 Okay.
13:19:56 Hmm.
13:19:49 And he'll get his social, he'll learn some of the skills, and then kindergarten comes, I'll… homeschool him. And really, he was having… He was having difficulties in the classroom, which was also part of the reason why I thought homeschooling would be better, because I…
13:20:08 Okay.
13:20:05 he was having some, like, emotional, behavioral, social… Delays is what was coming up for us, and I was just like, I don't know if the public school can… will… see him as, like, a whole being.
13:20:18 Uh, they're gonna, like, what are they gonna label him? What are they gonna do for him? So I really just had this distrust of the public school system.
13:20:25 Hmm…
13:20:25 And I just was, like, homeschooling is what I'm going to… kind of what I have to do, and also what I wanted to do, just to protect him, protect his identity.
13:20:34 And just make sure he could develop at the speed.
13:20:33 Yeah.
13:20:41 Yeah…
13:20:38 he needed to develop, because I already knew he wasn't going to be… mature enough, and… Academically, he was pretty good, but, like, still, he was… he was also gonna be five and a half.
13:20:49 Because of the way the age… he's a January baby, so it's like, you either have to wait and hold him out until he's six and a half.
13:20:52 Ah, okay. Yep.
13:20:56 Or you have to just, like, send him now, so… for me, when we… You know, I talked to wise counsel, um, my sister's a teacher, my sister-in-law was a.
13:21:07 kindergarten teacher before she stayed home as a mom.
13:21:10 And had just, you know, talked to his preschool, and they were all, like.
13:21:26 Yes.
13:21:16 I think you should send him… it's gonna be hard… But it's gonna be good for him. And it kind of came down to us, like, we needed resources. We needed speech therapy, we needed some, you know, we're getting IEP stuff for OT and developmental delays, so, like, we needed more resources than.
13:21:31 Yeah.
13:21:34 I was equipped to give. Um, so that ultimately is kind of what led… and I do believe God put us where we're at, because.
13:21:42 Any other public school system, I don't… I think we would have chosen a homeschool and just… had to hire private tutors, or figured things out.
13:21:50 Yes.
13:21:50 But our school system. Um, even though it's public, it's still very conservative, like, a lot… It's a very small town.
13:22:00 primarily a Christian, um… The principal is a woman, and she, like, I cried with her on the phone for an hour, like, she's been just so amazing, the teachers have been amazing with him, and like.
13:22:08 Wow.
13:22:11 coming up with plans to help him transition and, you know, doing… putting things in place to help him thrive.
13:22:17 Where he's at, and not putting expectations on him.
13:22:20 Yes. Yep.
13:22:21 So that's been my public school experience for, like, you know, we started in August, and it's November 3rd, so, like, for the first, you know, 3 months.
13:22:31 It's been… It's been a journey, but I feel like.
13:22:39 Yes.
13:22:35 God, like He called you to take yours out, I felt like He was calling us, like… and I also… I think we will homeschool. I don't think this is the end-all, be-all for us.
13:22:46 Mmm…
13:22:46 And it will kind of a season-by-season decision. But I think it's just worth having the conversation of, okay, what… What can education look like through… a kingdom lens for you and I, and it's gonna look different, and so that's why we have to have that discernment.
13:22:59 Yeah…
13:23:02 Of what is God actually calling us to do for the season that we're in, so…
13:23:07 Yes, definitely, definitely. I think that it's, um… It's important to understand that every child.
13:23:14 to God is individual. And he has been intentional, and will continue to be intentional in that child's life, right? So what… was the decision for your child, and what God was leading you towards for your child is going to be different.
13:23:31 In some instances, for me and my children, because he knows them so personally.
13:23:37 Whether they know him yet like that. or not, he knows them so personally, and knows what they need in each season, just.
13:23:45 I think it's very easy for us as adults to say, no, but, you know, he's my father, so God knows exactly what I need. Yes, but… To them, he also knows exactly what they need, and they are as important to him as you are.
13:23:27 Yes. Mm-hmm.
13:23:58 So I think it's fantastic, because a lot of the time in this particular conversation, there is a lot, um, of debate, you know, that this way's better, or that way's better. No, no, no, what's better is what.
13:24:06 Yes.
13:24:10 God is leading you to for your child. That is what is better.
13:24:15 Yes, I think that's so true, like, that's why I… What this conversation is going to be more about discernment, and we're going to give different perspectives and things that we thought about, because.
13:24:25 We want you to make a wise decision that's obedient to where God's calling you.
13:24:30 And… not from a place of judgment or fear.
13:24:34 Definitely.
13:24:34 So I think there's a lot of… there's a lot of judgment, especially in America. I don't know what the scene's like for you in the UK, but in America, it's kind of like.
13:24:43 homeschool versus public school, and there's this, like. subculture, yeah.
13:24:45 Oh, definitely the same. Yeah, it's a battle. It just feels like it's a big, big battle, and everyone thinks that they're right.
13:24:53 Mm-hmm. Yeah. That is true. And on the right is somewhere in the middle.
13:25:01 Exactly! Exactly! So, yeah, no, this is fantastic, it's good.
13:25:02 Um, everybody. So… What does education look like for you through a kingdom lens?
13:25:13 Wow, that's a great question. I think, first and foremost, it has to be.
13:25:19 teaching our children. the things of God.
13:25:22 And how to develop a relationship with him for themselves.
13:25:26 Right? Because I think it's always… it's really easy to kind of ignore that particular part when it comes to education, but education is… about the knowledge of things, right? So I need you to also understand the knowledge of God.
13:25:40 And what that relationship will look like for you.
13:25:44 And then also what God says about you, and, you know, who He is calling you to be. So that all, for me personally, that.
13:25:53 forms education. That's the real foundation. of education. And then next, it has to be excellence, and I say that all the time to people that I speak to.
13:26:02 Because we serve an excellent God. So what we teach our children, or whether it's at school or at home.
13:26:10 Either way, their education has to be excellent. And it has to be to a standard where they are being called to more.
13:26:19 you know, because I think that the mantle that is on our children is a very special one.
13:26:24 They are… they… it's bigger than us just quoting scripture at them. They really are called and chosen. You know, so it's important for me that they receive an education that matches that.
13:26:36 And helps them to grow into excellence as well, because that's really, really important.
13:26:25 Yeah.
13:26:41 Yes, I agree with you on that. And I think that's… for me, if our public school wasn't.
13:26:48 living up to those standards, then I… I would easily be like, okay, we'll try this for maybe the first semester. I was like, I'm gonna give you 9 weeks, and then I'm like, okay, I'm gonna give you a semester. I have no problem pulling my job. Like, I kind of went in with that attitude.
13:27:01 But I… because I would, like, not only do I want his identity to be rooted and founded as a.
13:27:09 Hmm…
13:27:07 child of God, and… I want him also to… receive what he needs and match where he's at, because.
13:27:16 Yes.
13:27:17 I don't know if you've heard this saying, but I love this saying, because it really has put children in perspective. Like, children are kind of like a bag of popcorn, where, like, they pop at different rates.
13:27:27 They all pop eventually, but I mean, most of them.
13:27:29 Yeah, yeah.
13:27:31 It's not… it's not 100% perfect, you know, metaphor, but… They pop at different rates, and I… I, like, I just feel like there's so much grace in that analogy, because we can be like, yeah, like, my kid's gonna pop.
13:27:45 He's gonna get there. He just may need a little bit more time.
13:27:46 Yeah, yeah.
13:27:50 compared to your kid, who's, like, a fast popper.
13:27:53 Yes. Yes. Or just a little bit more support or encouragement.
13:27:57 Yeah. Yes, yeah.
13:27:58 you know, and it all comes down to nurturing, right? So, it sounds like you… you've got a school that is really, really good at that, really good at nurturing the child.
13:28:05 Yes. Yes.
13:28:08 you know, how… in various ways, because every child needs to be nurtured differently. And so I'd never heard that metaphor, but actually, I now really like it. Because it really is the truth. Hopefully, they all pop, but… They will fall back at different rates.
13:28:17 Yeah.
13:28:23 Um, and so it is… it is about finding the right.
13:28:29 Yes.
13:28:28 environment. That's the key, the environment. has to be one that actually acknowledges that every child is different, and they will learn at different speeds and different rates, and in different ways.
13:28:40 And then teaching them how that is actually a strength, not a weakness.
13:28:46 Right, yes. Yes, that's… that's such a great way, Cincinel, to say that.
13:28:51 So, what would you say are some of the biggest blessings.
13:28:55 that you've experienced through homeschooling, and some of the biggest challenges that you've experienced through homeschooling.
13:29:01 Wow, it's… I think sometimes it's easier to think of the challenges first.
13:29:06 Yes.
13:29:06 But I'm gonna try… I'm gonna try and go with the blessings first. Um, I think… for my… for one of my children, it has been, um, the same one I mentioned earlier. It's been seeing his personality actually come back.
13:29:22 Um, seeing him grow, uh, in boldness and confidence.
13:29:27 Um, and being able to attribute that growth to him receiving that one-on-one attention.
13:29:35 and care when it comes to his education. So for me, that's been a major blessing.
13:29:39 Um, but for all of my children, it's been allowing them to really settle in.
13:29:45 to where they feel like they fit in. So the things, you know, that they want to explore, extracurricular activities that they want to explore, that they are now able to freely explore. You know, one of my children plays the electric guitar, it's very random, but.
13:30:00 He absolutely loves it, and so he's able to take lessons during the day, if that, you know, if that's what.
13:30:07 the teacher has available, and there's a lot more freedom, and I think that that's been a blessing.
13:30:12 Um, for me as well. And a really big one that I can't ignore is just spending that time with them.
13:30:20 Um, I acknowledge that they are only small for a very, very short time, and… And a scripture that actually I really lean on in my book.
13:30:31 which is relevant to how I view educating my children, is Psalm 127, and so it's the children are arrows. They're like arrows.
13:30:42 born-to-one in their youth. So, for me, I know that one day, those arrows, I have to let go.
13:30:48 And I have to release them, you know, to do what God has called them to do. So for now, it's a real blessing to be able to.
13:30:55 sit with them and, you know, teach them the things that they should learn.
13:31:00 And just get that quality time with them. I think that's… that's unmatched.
13:31:04 Um, but there's definitely been challenges as well. There's been some challenges as well. Um, I think the first thing was when I first began homeschooling them, I didn't realize how tired I would be.
13:31:18 I think I… I just… I didn't really sit down to think about.
13:31:23 what it would mean to be on call to my children.
13:31:28 all the time, so normally I was used to, you know, taking them to school, and then I've got this time in the daytime to do what needs to be done, I also run a business, so spending that time on.
13:31:40 business things, that's great, and then I pick them up from school, and then we spend time together in the evening.
13:31:44 But, suddenly, I was kind of thrown into, no, there is no your time right now until they're in bed. This is… you're on call.
13:31:53 No. Um, and I was absolutely exhausted at first. Now I think I've adjusted.
13:31:58 But that was a major challenge for me. Um, and really, another big challenge was.
13:32:07 Learning to teach them things that I didn't think that I was very strong in.
13:32:12 So, for example, I've always said that math is not my thing.
13:32:17 Um, I'm… I can do financial… uh, calculations with no problem at all.
13:32:24 But when it comes to algebra and all these, you know, geometry, it just was not my… it was not my forte at all.
13:32:34 Um, but the freedom there is in homeschooling is that, actually, you don't have to be great at everything.
13:32:41 You can get external help, there are tutors available.
13:32:46 Uh, but there are courses that you can take yourself.
13:32:49 that kind of sharpen your own knowledge. So actually, in the end, the challenges have worked out a little bit.
13:32:56 But that doesn't take them away from the fact that they are challenging.
13:33:00 So, yeah.
13:33:10 or I… I don't like the word ballast, I like the word synergy, which means everything flows together. How are you able to synergize those roles of mother, teacher.
13:33:15 Yep.
13:33:19 spiritual leader to your children in the home.
13:33:23 Yeah, it's… it certainly was difficult at first. I think now.
13:33:28 I have become really, really good. kind of putting everything in the compartment that it's meant to be in. So when I'm teaching, I am your mum, but I'm also your teacher.
13:33:38 Mm-hmm.
13:33:40 So, I need the dual respect, is how I say it to my children. You know, you need to give me the same respect you'd give your teacher, but also the respect that I'm due as your mum.
13:33:50 Um, and yeah, so it's about, for me, it really is about, you know, having.
13:33:50 Yes.
13:33:55 those compartments in my mind first, because the biggest challenge is the mental challenge, right? And overcoming those… those thoughts in your… those intrusive thoughts that actually.
13:34:05 I'm not going to be good at this, so I don't know what I'm doing.
13:34:08 Um, and how am I going to parent this child, but teach this child at the same time? I'm not even sure how that works.
13:34:15 But actually, formulating that in your mind to say no.
13:34:18 I was always their teacher. Even when I was taking my children to school, I was still their teacher.
13:34:26 Because I am the one that taught them how to walk, how to speak.
13:34:31 you know, do basic things, how to have manners. So I've always been teaching them. All I did.
13:34:37 We'll substitute some of the subjects. to another environment and another person, but I didn't give up the role.
13:34:45 So, you know, once I kind of got my head around that.
13:34:49 I found that it all fit together quite well. And then in embracing that I was always their teacher, I was actually able to embrace.
13:34:58 that spiritual leader. role as well, and saying, you know, actually.
13:35:02 God has given me these children. It is my job.
13:35:05 You know, yes, it's my husband's job as well, but I am with them all the time, so it is my job.
13:35:11 to teach them spiritually as well. It's not just about math and language and, you know, what am I teaching them about the Word of God? What am I teaching them? Who is Jesus to them?
13:35:21 Do they know who he is? You know, these are real questions, because.
13:35:25 I think I will have to answer those questions one day.
13:35:29 So, it was about… actually, it all comes under teacher.
13:35:32 It all comes under mum. But you need to get your head around the fact that it's all one role in the first place, and kind of.
13:35:41 have those compartments in your mind. And it just… it will flow together.
13:35:10 I love that. I think that's so helpful. I have a question that came up.
13:35:51 Does your husband help at… do you guys, like, take turns on any subjects? Like, is there subjects that maybe he'll teach if you're… he's stronger in them? Because I'm like, I tell my husband, like, I married you to do my math for me, like… I'm in the same boat with you, like, I can do math, and I'm like, I'm not doing it in my head, and like.
13:36:03 Yep.
13:36:09 No. Yeah, oh my goodness!
13:36:08 2 seconds. Carrie the one, think about it.
13:36:15 Yes! Yes, the answer to that is yes. Most subjects, I… I think he will say as well that I do.
13:36:23 Um, I tend to take the lead on most of the subjects, but when it comes to math.
13:36:26 I do pass it over gently, and say, you know, I can help to a certain extent, but actually, the person to talk to is really Daddy. Go and speak to Daddy about this.
13:36:36 Um, and because we… we are blessed to be able to run a business, he's here as well, so we're all in the same place at the same time, and so he gets to kind of help out.
13:36:47 And with the science experiments that we do, because we do a lot of those. I have very, very scientific children.
13:36:54 Which I didn't know before I started homeschooling them.
13:36:57 Um, so I get… I kind of draw him in.
13:37:00 to take over with the experiments as well. He's great at that.
13:37:05 That's so cool. How, um… I just lost my train of thought. But it was with your husband.
13:37:13 Oh, how do you guys have your house set up? Do you have, like, stations where you're like, this is where we come, we do schoolwork, and it's really just for schoolwork?
13:37:22 Or how do you make it… fit into your home, I guess.
13:37:27 Yeah, so that's a… that's a great question, because we do things a bit strangely here. So, when we first started.
13:37:34 I was thinking that, you know, everything had to be exactly like school.
13:37:39 Right? So… I kind of said, you know, everything… all the work that we do, we do it in the kitchen, at the table, and it's all… really, really structured.
13:37:51 Um, and so in the UK, right, so we call… we don't actually… we make a point not to call it homeschooling.
13:37:56 So that we don't confuse it with school. So it's a big deal here. We call it home education.
13:38:00 Okay.
13:38:03 So, I began to realize through friends that I made that actually.
13:38:10 I can make it… how I want it to be.
13:38:14 I can do it how I want it to be done.
13:38:17 And it needs… as long as it fits my children.
13:38:20 So I looked around my house and realized that the one room that my children are not really allowed to play in.
13:38:27 is my bedroom. So actually, what if I did the schooling in my bedroom? Because it's not seen as the room for playing anyway.
13:38:35 So, we now sit in my… on my bedroom floor, we sit on chairs in there, and we just do our own thing. You'll see them in there working through their workbooks.
13:38:46 And I'm sitting with them, and we're going through it, and then once it's all… once we've done with our work for the day, then we leave that room, and, you know, it feels like there's a… slight separation, a bit church and state.
13:38:59 And I've found that that really works quite well.
13:38:35 Yes.
13:39:03 Yes, I like that. That's… I had this picture in my head. We have a basement, and so I was like, this is gonna be the section where we… carve out, like, a little desk, and… you know, can put stuff on the walls.
13:39:15 I was also thinking, Elijah, because he's a five and a half year old boy who wants to get money, who wants to jump around, who's not gonna sit… and that was part of my concern.
13:39:21 Hmm…
13:39:26 sending him… I'm like, I don't want… him to get in trouble for just being a boy.
13:39:30 Because we're not meant to sit still for 8 hours a day.
13:39:31 Yes. Yes.
13:39:34 And focus, and I was like, we could go kayaking and do nature hikes, and scavenger hunts, so I was kind of looking at homeschooling as an opportunity to be more of.
13:39:40 Yeah, yeah.
13:39:44 Like, I'm… I guess a Montessori style, if you're familiar with that.
13:39:48 Yep, yep.
13:39:50 type of schooling, but, like, more, yeah, like, engaged and… And so, I like that you said, yes, we have… we do have, like, a separate place, and I think that is important, too. Like, we have… this is where we go, we do our teaching, and then, yeah, you have your playroom, you have your bedroom where you sleep.
13:40:05 Yes.
13:40:05 That's just… I think that… just in my years of learning how to organize spaces and create spaces, I just think that's wise anyway, like.
13:40:19 Hmm…
13:40:15 You have, like, we don't have a TV in our bedroom, because this is where we sleep. We don't watch TV in our bedroom. This is our… quite time. We've had TVs in the past in bedrooms, so don't get me wrong, but…
13:40:24 Yeah.
13:40:25 I was like, in our new house, I'm like, babe, we're not having a TV. This is where we're gonna come sleep, like, let's create a space.
13:40:32 Where our bodies know. This is where we relax.
13:40:33 Mmm, I love that. Mmm…
13:40:35 And let's create a space for Elijah where he's like, this is your safe space, you can go play, you can throw balls, like, I'm not gonna freak out if you're throwing a ball like I would if you're in my kitchen, and I'm like.
13:40:40 Yes.
13:40:46 Don't, you know, break this, or like… So, creating those spaces and environment where.
13:40:46 Yeah.
13:40:51 I just think that's… that's wise, so I'm glad you brought that up.
13:40:55 Yeah, I think it… and I think it helps. I think it helps the children as well.
13:40:58 Mm-hmm. Yeah.
13:40:59 Um, because I always say, even today, I said to my husband, you know, I need a clear space.
13:41:05 you know, if something's not clear, I don't feel like my mind is very clear.
13:41:09 Um, and I think children are very similar. They need to know.
13:41:09 Agreed.
13:41:13 Okay, this is what we do here, so even our resources are on a particular bookshelf. Nothing else is on that bookshelf.
13:41:21 everything that we use for schooling is on the bookshelf. And so they know where to go, and it just… it creates a little bit of… Um, order for them, you know, mentally, which is amazing. And then.
13:41:33 you know, once we're done with our work, we love.
13:41:36 we've discovered recently, that we love forest walks. And building dens in the forest.
13:41:43 And so you get to kind of… you get to put away your schoolwork in your mind, okay, I've left this room, this is where I do this work, now I'm going out there, I'm gonna go out there and do… some really creative things, I want to be free.
13:41:56 Um, so I love that as well, because that opens up a new space in their mind.
13:42:01 Yeah, and I love that, because that could be a science experiment. That could be, you know, you can take.
13:42:09 those, um, excursions, if you will, those little field trips to wherever, and make them a part of your homeschooling experience, and that was one of the draws that I had.
13:42:14 Mm-hmm.
13:42:18 to homeschooling, it's like, oh, we could learn about the sun.
13:42:23 Mmm…
13:42:22 And the birds and the insects, while we're out on a walk, or while we're playing, you know, with this magnifying glass, and… Yeah, I've totally visited one. I'm like, I'll teach you how to… start a buyer was reminded by the glass.
13:42:29 Yeah.
13:42:37 I'm like, what 5-year-old boy doesn't need to know that.
13:42:35 Oh my gosh! Yeah, you sound like you're… You are going… see, I think I can see a homeschooler in you.
13:42:45 One day, I can see that that's where you're going. Even if it's just for you.
13:42:46 Yeah, I'm, like, waiting. Yeah. Okay, I'll just switch a little bit to public school, because I think this is a great topic of how do we be intentional.
13:42:59 about discipling and equipping spiritually our children within that environment.
13:43:07 Um, and I know you have a little bit of… wisdom on that, because you… you send your son to home, or to public school, so, like, what was that like for you?
13:43:12 Yep.
13:43:17 was, okay, you are going to send your child off. What were some things that you did to… really disciple and start to equip and empower him up in his faith.
13:43:26 even before homeschooling.
13:43:30 Yeah, so for me, it was really being intentional about speaking to my sons, it was… both of my sons at the time, speaking to them after school every day, you know, spending time with them, choosing a scripture.
13:43:45 going through that scripture, knowing that there was a possibility that they didn't actually.
13:43:58 Yes.
13:43:49 go through any biblical. content, right, at school, even though it's a Christian school, that's not a given. That's what they're doing at school. So, I… I always took it very, very seriously that there was still an element that I had to do. I did have to sit down with them, I did have to do the reading that, you know, from.
13:44:10 that they were assigned from school, the spelling, all these things, but I also had to go through the Bible.
13:44:16 just have a chat, you know, did you have any fears or concerns today? Do you know what to do with those when you have them?
13:44:24 Have you considered just talking to Jesus? You know, he's there. Just having these conversations with them that were age-appropriate.
13:44:31 but also showing them every single step of the way, that actually.
13:44:35 It doesn't matter where you are, God is there. It doesn't matter what you're going through, He's still there, and your relationship with Him.
13:44:43 is ongoing, whether you're at school. or wear at home, or we're out somewhere, it's still ongoing, so you can be thinking about God and what He's thinking about you.
13:44:52 all the time. And so it was… it was really just about that level of intentionality, and knowing that I had… I still had a job to do, even though they're at school.
13:45:03 I have to make sure that that environment for them is a sound environment.
13:45:07 And the best way I knew how to do that, after choosing the school, of course.
13:45:12 was to ensure that they knew, they began to realize who they were in Christ.
13:45:17 So that wherever they went. whatever environment they were… that they walked into, they were able to stand strong with strength.
13:45:26 And say, actually, no, no, that… I've noticed that, and that's not correct, because I spoke to my mum, and she said that that's not correct, that's not how we treat people, that's not what we do. You know, just little seeds.
13:45:37 in them. And yeah, I found that that worked.
13:45:41 Well, I hope, anyway.
13:45:44 Yes. I'm sure it is, I'm sure it's working. I follow along the same lines of, like, especially once we made the decision, like, we were going to do public school, it became even more… uh, like…
13:45:57 extreme, almost, to be like, I need to make sure he knows his identity.
13:46:00 As the Son of God. And, like, what does that look like to be a child of God, and to be brave and courageous and considerate? What are the characteristics of a child of God? And that's your identity, and then your behavior, hopefully, will eventually flow from that.
13:46:17 Yes.
13:46:17 identity, just like, if… like a royal, if you think about it from a… you know, a secular perspective, like, somebody who's a king, they're gonna behave like a king, they're not gonna behave like a peasant. It's not… right? They're gonna…
13:46:27 Yeah.
13:46:28 They're gonna behave from the identity that they were given. So, as Kingdom Mothers.
13:46:34 I've done my best to be as intentional, be, like, speaking that this is his identity over him.
13:46:40 And so, for those who are in public school, here's some things that I've been implementing.
13:46:46 While we're in Carline, I know some people do school bus, we do car line, because that was, like, my ground… I was like, I'm a… yeah, you're not riding the bus. It's a 45-minute bus ride from my house to school. I'm like, I'm not… I draw the line there. So, like, I will take you to school and pick up, and…
13:46:55 Oh, wow.
13:47:03 So, we… when we get into the car line, I read a chapter in the Bible or Scripture, it kind of depends. We're in Genesis right now, so I just started… I just have my bio… his… it's actually his Bible.
13:47:10 Mmm…
13:47:14 Um, and I just read through that. We do prayer.
13:47:18 And so I'm teaching them how to do kind of a spiritual warfare prayer, too, where we're, like, we're preceding the blood of Jesus, we're praying over our school.
13:47:23 Oh, excellent! Hmm…
13:47:27 We're, um, just, like, also being grat… speaking gratitude, be like, God, thank you for this beautiful day, like, the sun's shining, and… Um, and then we do declarations, so I'm like.
13:47:35 Mmm…
13:47:39 I am brave, I am strong, I'm courageous, I can do hard things. Um, I am the head and not the tail, like, so there's different… pieces of scripture that I'm speaking.
13:47:53 Mm-mm, it's good.
13:47:51 over him, but also having him say. And he's, you know, jumping around, moving around. He's, again, 5 year… 5 and a half year old.
13:47:59 Yep, lots of energy.
13:48:00 he's half paying attention. But it's, like, that consistency of doing that every morning.
13:48:06 Hmm…
13:48:06 in the car line, and then we, you know, at night before bed, we say prayers, and… We'll do some books, but typically, like, in the morning is really where I feel like I get that space.
13:48:18 to start his day with that intentionality to speak that life into Him.
13:48:19 Yeah.
13:48:24 Hmm, that's good.
13:48:24 Um… with the hope and the prayer that he's going into school, and one day those will click, and those will start to be, like, he'll start to believe them for himself, and not just something mom says.
13:48:35 Yeah. Yeah. Definitely.
13:48:37 And, like, this scripture, you know, I'm learning… So, those are some things for parents who are listening who are doing public school.
13:48:46 Mmm…
13:48:45 Some ways that I have found to be intentional around discipling my son and helping to equip him.
13:48:53 Mm-hmm.
13:48:53 Because I think, like, there… for me, it's like… We're kind of sending our children.
13:49:00 into this battlefield, if you will. And so that was one of my big, like, public school, like.
13:49:03 Yes.
13:49:08 I'm, like, basically putting a missionary in a mission field that he hasn't been trained for.
13:49:13 And that's been a perspective I've took on, and so I'm like, how can I equip him.
13:49:13 Yeah, wow.
13:49:17 To the best of my ability with what I have right now.
13:49:21 And then you just kind of have to pray, you know, God, He's in your hands.
13:49:21 Mmm…
13:49:25 Yes, definitely.
13:49:25 Um, but I also, as a mom. I just wanted to speak this to my kingdom mothers who have kids. I just believe there's been a mission on my heart that.
13:49:35 I'm too wore an interseed on behalf of my school corporation. So, every day, I'm praying for the elementary, middle school, high school, and our administrative buildings.
13:49:40 Mmm…
13:49:45 And I'm just, like, interceding, like, no weapon for and against them, like, infiltrate, like, Holy Spirit, infiltrate.
13:49:52 All the hallways, the classrooms, like, let people have encounters with you.
13:49:55 Yeah.
13:49:56 And so I think, especially… and America, like.
13:50:02 We have so many, so much gun violence and that type of stuff, and… I'm not… that's all what this episode's about.
13:50:08 Um, but, like, there's just a lot of warfare, spiritual warfare, I feel like, in our public school system happening right now. There's so much warfare on our kids' identity.
13:50:14 Yeah. Mmm…
13:50:25 Definitely.
13:50:18 And maybe try and distill their identity, he's trying to steal their peace, and it's all happening in the school district, so… Part of me felt like, okay, if God was putting my son into the school district, He's also putting me in there, and how can I…
13:50:34 intercede on behalf of. where God has placed us. Like, for whatever reason, He's called us here.
13:50:39 And so how can I, as a Kingdom Mother.
13:50:39 Yeah.
13:50:41 just… put a hedge of protection around that place.
13:50:45 No, exactly. It's so important, and you've given some great tips, I think. Um, and I would just add to that, you know, intercede for your child, yes.
13:50:55 But if you are listening and you have children in the public school system.
13:50:55 Hmm, that's…
13:51:00 you know, there is definitely no reason to be afraid of what's happening there.
13:51:04 Right.
13:51:04 know that you have… you have been placed there, and your child has been placed there for a reason. So you are in a great position.
13:51:13 to intercede for your child, for your child's friends, and get your child involved as well. You know, it doesn't matter how young your child actually is.
13:51:23 Whether it's 5 or younger or older, it doesn't matter. You can be praying for your children, you can be praying around your children.
13:51:31 And, you know, just stop for a moment and say to your child, oh, and what… can you just tell me one of your friends' names?
13:51:36 They say in name, oh, actually, can you pray for, you know, little Gavin? Great! Pray for Gavin! You know, and then, so immediately, you're actually… getting your child involved and showing them, oh, wait, hang on a second, I can do this. I can do this myself.
13:51:49 I could pray for Gavin if I really wanted to.
13:51:52 you know, but another thing is that I would recommend for all parents.
13:51:57 is to start a Bible study. with your children. It doesn't matter, you know, I mean, there's some great ups out there.
13:52:06 And we use a great app, and it's just… you can just search for Bible study for kids, Bible plans for kids.
13:52:12 And so we're currently doing one, for example, on Wild Faith. And it's written for children, but it's one that you do with your children. And by doing that, you are equipping them.
13:52:23 to go out. The next day, they're gonna go to school. If you're doing that in the evening, at bedtime, or you've got time in the morning and you're doing that with them, you are equipping them to go into that battlefield. They don't even know that they're in a battle.
13:52:36 But you do, so you are in a great position to equip them, to build them up, so that the enemy cannot come and steal their identity from them. In fact.
13:52:46 he begins to back away from them. The Bible says that if you resist the devil, he will flee. So he begins to flee from them because you have done this equipping. So it doesn't matter whether they're at home with you.
13:52:57 or they're at public school, what are you doing to equip them? Because you can do it.
13:53:09 Um, when you had your kids in public school, what were some ways that you tried to stay engaged with what was being taught, and just kind of knowing what was going on in the school?
13:53:21 Oh my gosh, yeah, that is so, so important. Um, so, I mean, we… our school was… was very, very good at communication.
13:53:30 So, we… at the end of each day, you could stop, you could have a conversation with the teacher, and that is what either myself or my husband did. We would make sure that not a day went past where we would.
13:53:41 have just 5 to 10 minutes. with the teacher, what, you know, just to ask what was being taught that day, is there anything that we can reinforce at home?
13:53:51 Um, that you learned today. And, you know, just, I mean, it allowed us to keep on top of what was being taught to ensure that everything that was being taught was actually in line with.
13:54:02 our own, you know, biblical values, because that was really important to us.
13:54:07 And then, if there was anything that wasn't in line, we were then able to provide a nice little correction with our child.
13:54:14 you know, and the rest of our children to say, actually, no, that's not what the Bible says, or that's not what we believe, or, you know, just different things, but I think it's so important to have conversations. Just try and.
13:54:25 get hold of your child's teacher when you can. I know that in some schools, it's really difficult to speak to them.
13:54:34 Yeah.
13:54:32 Every day. But… A lot of schools now implement a notebook or a diary where they will write in it.
13:54:40 And you, as the parent, can write in it, and I would advocate for writing a note.
13:54:45 in that notebook or diary and say, hi, you know, hope you're well. Just wondered if you could just give me a couple of bullet points on what is being taught this semester, or, you know, just… And I guarantee that the teacher is going to do it, because they're looking for interested parents.
13:55:01 So, as soon as you reach out in that way, in any way.
13:55:04 They're going to facilitate, oh, great! You want to know, that's wonderful. And they'll give you some information which will help.
13:55:01 Yes, I think that's so true. I've found that to be… We have a pretty good, uh.
13:55:18 communication system, we have a portal that we can almost, like, text, but it's, like, through a portal.
13:55:24 Um, and then, yeah, we have a folder, and so it's, like, take home, take… Back to school, and so, like, I'm picking my son up early, so I, like, leave a little note for.
13:55:34 To be like, I'm gonna become pick a reminder, I'm picking them up early today.
13:55:37 Yep, yep.
13:55:39 Those kind of, like, a little pen pal situation going on there, but then we also have the portal, and they give us a recap of, like, what's been going on, and… We're in kindergarten, so we're learning sight words and different math stuff, but…
13:55:47 Oh, that's good. Yes.
13:55:59 Oh, yeah.
13:55:51 So, that's been really good, and I would say, like, I… If you have the opportunity, I've been able to volunteer for a field trip, and I went in and volunteered for, like, an art project to help out. I needed extra parents. So try to just, like, get engaged.
13:56:05 I even requested a meeting, I was like. I would love to meet the principal.
13:56:11 the teacher, um, we… we also needed some extra counseling support, so I was like, can we set up a meeting where my husband and I can come in and kind of just meet?
13:56:21 Mmm…
13:56:19 the team for Elijah, because… I mean, I was, like, meeting random people on the car line, being like, hey, this is so-and-so, and I do this, but I'm like.
13:56:27 This is the most stressful way to introduce… like, I'm in the car line, it's like, in and out, like, we got… I don't have time to, like, say hello!
13:56:31 Definitely.
13:56:36 No, you're under pressure. And the person behind you is putting you under more pressure.
13:56:39 Yeah. Exactly, so it's like, nice to meet you, I don't remember your name because I'm trying to, like.
13:56:47 So, yeah. So, like, I think being initiating… those meetings and not being afraid to ask for, hey, I would love to have a conversation, or like, can we meet?
13:56:58 at some point, and hopefully your school system is, you know, willing.
13:57:07 Yeah.
13:57:03 And if they're not willing, that might be a red flag, but… I think, like, try to be intentional with… if you are in the circumstances where you need to be in public school, or that's where God's called you to be, like.
13:57:14 You can still be an intentional parent with volunteering, with.
13:57:19 Yeah, definitely.
13:57:19 communicating with the teachers, and like you said, I feel like the teachers appreciate the parents that are.
13:57:26 more hands-on, and that are showing that they want to.
13:57:28 Yeah…
13:57:29 care for their children, so… Um, my gosh, this has been so good.
13:57:38 Okay.
13:57:34 Okay, let's… two more questions, and then we'll, like, wrap up a little bit. So, if you could encourage… some Kingdom others with at least one takeaway about educating and discipling their children. What would you say that would be?
13:57:48 I would say that it's really important for you to know that whether your child is.
13:57:55 being homeschooled, or is in public school. You are their main teacher.
13:58:01 That's the first thing. Um, and that means that you have to… Acknowledge that and take the role as seriously as you can. So, I talk a lot about this, um, in my book, about the fact that parenting is actually ministry, right?
13:58:17 So, I don't think that… a lot of mothers in particular see it that way, because we've spent a lot of time with the world telling us that, you know, we're not.
13:58:29 you're just a mom, you know, you're not doing anything that's special. But the truth is, is that you are discipling these children, you are teaching these children, and you have been called to do so. So you need to take it as seriously.
13:58:41 as you take, you know, feeding them and clothing them, and it is, you know, their education is very important, and it's important to God.
13:58:50 So, you need to just ensure that you're doing what you can do, and taking a proactive approach.
13:58:57 in making sure that you are the first teacher, even if they have other teachers. That's fine, that's great.
13:59:02 But you are the first teacher, so you need to just make sure that you are.
13:59:06 in the know about what they are being taught.
13:59:10 how they are being taught, and does it actually work.
13:59:18 Yes.
13:59:13 for your child. Don't be afraid, don't be afraid to advocate for your child. That's… that's your job. And… We will all celebrate with you when you do that, you know, but don't let anybody shoot you down and make you think that.
13:59:25 Oh, well, no, they go to school, so I'm just going to leave it to the teacher. No, your voice is still extremely important in their life and in their education.
13:59:35 So, you know, we will stand with you as you use it, because they need you to.
13:59:49 Definitely.
13:59:40 Yes, that's so good. I think at the end of the day, whether you… or choosing to homeschool our public school, it's gonna take a village. So, whether you have… your village includes a public school education system and teachers, or you've got tutors and.
13:59:55 co-ops and the homeschool space, like. get that… choose your village. If you do as much as you can to choose.
14:00:00 Mmm…
14:00:02 the people who are going to be pouring into your children, speaking life into them.
14:00:08 And be, like, meet the people in your village.
14:00:11 Yes, yes!
14:00:11 That's kind of like how I would wrap, like, especially in a public school, like, meet the people in the village that… that your kids the most.
14:00:15 Definitely, please.
14:00:18 Yes. Thank you so much, Sinibila, for hanging out with me today.
14:00:23 One last question, how can people find you if they want to connect with you and learn more about your story and your book? Which, by the way, I've been reading her book, it is amazing. I think I'm, like, halfway through.
14:00:33 So I'm definitely… I'm gonna put all of her, uh, socials in the book link in the show notes, so make sure you check that out, but… How can listeners connect with you and get your book?
14:00:40 Yeah, please. Yeah, so the main place is Instagram. I can always be found on Instagram.
14:00:49 Um, probably more than I should be, but… You can find me on Instagram, um, so Brandywall, it's really long, so Brandy will share my Instagram at… And, um, you can also feel free to email me, um, I'm always up for just a conversation, a chat.
14:01:07 You know, so please, feel free to send me an email, send me any questions that you have. My book is available on Amazon, if you just type in Not Just a Mother.
14:01:16 Um, it will come up by sending me a little OSA, and yeah, this has been amazing, thank you for having me. It's been absolutely wonderful. And I just… I just hope that it's been helpful.
14:01:24 Yes.
14:01:28 to all the Kingdom Mothers that are listening, you know, it's really an amazing job that you're doing.
14:01:34 And I just… I just want you to know that God sees it. It's important.
14:01:38 And God sees everything that you're doing for your children. That's key for you to know. So, yeah, thank you so much!